What the heck is going on with this blog?

This is the question I've been asking myself for the last few months.

When I decided to start this blog, I did tons of research. I work in digital marketing, so I'm familiar the landscape. I know the value of a good keyword and good organic Google rankings. I know how to curate an Instagram with balance, and the importance of setting up an email list so you 'own' your people. I was working hard at this. 'Efforting' as hard as I could, because I wanted to MAKE something of this blog.

And I came up with a few different angles as I was trying to determine my niche. What was my category? An American abroad in France. Sure...but I live in an expat community and I'm not fully immersed in French culture. So it didn't feel 100% true. Mindfulness! My best friend told me I'm the most mindful person she knows. And I am consciously trying to live a more mindful life, so I thought that'd be a good niche that I could rank well for. So I tried REALLY hard to write things that feel into that category. Oh, and then I read Neil Patel's blog 10x over and he talks about how a long blog post is really valuable, not only to the reader but for SEO. So I spent weeks writing and researching the longest, most comprehensive blog post on mindfully using social media. But I didn't really practice all those things. Some, yes. But how disingenuous is that?! 

So here I am. Six months since I wrote my last post (which isn't really the best track record for a brand new blog with roughly 5 posts) trying to figure it all out. I got caught up in traveling, buying a house, a busy winter, friends visiting, and a million other excuses that aren't excuses.

But I've changed my mindset. I wanted to rank well, to get sponsorships and make money. Which is all well and good, and a totally legitimate reason to spend time on a blog. But I was feeling inauthentic in my writing, and wasn't passionate about my articles. And that came across.

When I was in college/university, I really struggled to find where I fit in. On one hand, I was a girly-girl, in a sorority, on the university dance team and loved glitter, shopping and dancing on bars. At the same time I was also a camp counselor, who would sleep on the ground for weeks at a time and would skip class for multiple weeks just to strap her backpack on and frolic around Europe (sorry mom & dad!). I struggled with deciding which of these personalities was me. I didn't think there was a way to merge them. I was two different people at two different times. 

But at some point, and I'm not sure when, I realized I don't have to fit into one of these categories neatly. I can simultaneously be both of these things, and it's OK if they don't blend into a neat little box. It was one of the most liberating realizations of my 20's.

And yet here I was, nearly 30 years old, trying to define which box of all my boxes is the most keyword friendly.


Flowing Not Forcing

So, I've decided I'm writing about my life, and all it's complex categories. What I know, what I experience, what I try, and what I try to figure out. From yoga to travel, to renovating a house to life abroad, to self-development to capsule wardrobes, and what the hell else do I do? I am all of these things, and I want my blog to be all of me.

If I am in alignment with my true self, and I am enjoying writing, abundance and opportunity will come my way. I truly believe this. Thank you to Jess Lively for absolutely changing my perspective on life. I'm now finally aligned enough to realize I need to apply it to all aspects of my life. Moving away from 'efforting' and towards flow.

And so begins, the blog that is anything but simple. But I'll keep the name for now. :-)